Everyone asks, "Do you believe in soul mates?"
My answer is, "No."
Why, you might ask?
Well, that just means, out of EVERYONE in this world...there is only ONE person out there for you. I can feel the evil eyes piercing my soul right now. Ok, please do not shoot me down with ridicule. I am entitled to my own opinion, right?
After almost 29 years of experience (with life...that is), I have been through a number of different relationships. They have been up, down, sideways, backward, forward, underground, hell, and so on. That may be cause for my inclinations, but I have my reasons.
Soul mates. By definition, this term is associated with "wholeness", "one-ness", absolute unity. However, I do not believe that another person simply "makes you whole".
First of all, soul mates create a spiritual affinity in which there is a pre-destination to the "hook-up". In my personal standards, destiny does not give one FREE WILL. Destiny is a predetermined path that a soul takes in order to fill a higher degree of "blueprints" - if you will. No. I apologize with any offense taken, but the two do not coincide as an option for "free will". I believe in fate. Fate, to me, is the "other route". Meaning, fate is the illegitimate brother of destiny, which allows us to choose our own path, make our own decisions, and decide our own undoing. We all are part of an occult group of people who decide what is best for our lives, our families, our minds, our beliefs, and so on.
Secondly, soul mates, under the laws of "destiny", mean that we are only meant to be at a certain place, at a certain time, and that all the stars fall in a certain alignment at the meeting of souls. No. Because I believe that souls are recycled throughout time, I believe that creating a "one person for one person" deal creates a constriction on how everyone lives. People are convinced that their day to day activities will lead to meeting that one special person in their life that will take them amongst the stars. However, most of the time, that person ends up being a wolf in sheep's clothing. No matter where your soul is reborn, or if it is in general, there are certain people who are going to impact you without question. My belief, under the laws of fate, is that wherever your soul may be at the moment in time it is most susceptible to the option of companionship, is when you give yourself up to the idea of "love".
Now, i do believe in love, don't get me wrong. I see it every time I look into my beautiful son's eyes. However, blood does tread thicker than water. I believe that welcoming someone else in to your daily routine takes a lot of thought and hard work. Recently, I have come across a man who is terribly wonderful with my son. What are his intentions? Who knows. I haven't been on a "date". But what do you do with a person who looks at your children with the utmost respect and courtesy?
My soul does not scream for companionship. My soul does not scream for another parent for my child. Honestly, my soul screams for physical contact; non-blood related, deep conversations about life and all its mystery.
Ultimately, I want partnership. I want someone who will fill the emotional needs of my wonderful son; and fill the physical, emotional, and mental needs of me. Is that too much to ask? Probably. With the way technology works, there is no real establishment between the "real" and the "imaginary". I'm not saying I haven't looked at my share of restricted media, but I'm looking for someone who can actually establish between the body of an 18-year old porn star, and the body of a 28-year old, C-section, mother of one, who does not get the chance to work out because she is too busy trying to provide for her only child. Not me pictured above.
I'm not perfect. I have my faults. My independence has expanded into feminism, and my outlook on life as become a fantasy of a possible Audrey Hepburn movie ending. Have I really been able to establish a reality for myself? Possibly...no. But I have a killer movie ending and a number of side shows to go along with it.
Therefore, soul mates. Are they real? I don't believe it. I believe in a soul companion. What the heart wants, the heart may get...but don't always count on it. We are a people who thirst on the macabre, who want the worst out of life, including the world around us. What is more romantic than a failing marriage with an amazing affair? Well, okay, the idea of tight ass men (or women) running around in practically nothing, slaying the nearest flesh they can find, is slightly pushing the envelope. Gross you may say? Humanity says otherwise.
Throughout history, even amongst to current history, evidence suggests that it is human nature there be war, killing, and adultery. I'm not trying to dampen the evening, merely stating a fact. Even at the execution of Jesus, the Romans felt the need to rid the world of anything considered "good" and "holy" at the misleading idea of humanity's sake, at the progression of human nature, or at the expansion of "free will". Who wants a Saviour who bounds the human chain of wretches, and not the elite, to the possible idea of good and righteousness? Unfortunately, again, tis human nature. "HANG HIM!" most probably screamed. For many, it was a feast for the senses. Although, under the control of God, Jesus may very well have had a destiny or sorts.
One of my very favorite examples is Spartacus. While not entirely historically accurate, many realize the brutality of human nature through a cinematic performance. Overly dramatic? Maybe. But when it boils down to severed heads, gallons of spilled blood, and the roar of the crowd, you can't help but realize the brutality of human nature.
Therefore, you may ask: What the bloodiness does this have to do with soul mates?
Along with God-given free will, our chances of meeting the man/woman of our dreams is slim to none. Perfection does not exist. And while marriage to the man/woman of our dreams is not guaranteed perfection, it still maintains highly elusive precedence over marrying for the sake of companionship and fulfillment. The proven sense of "entitlement" overcomes the idea of honesty, loyalty, and trustworthiness. Instead, human nature overthrows the concept of monogamy, into the lost perception of: it's all about me. And that does not bode well in a relationship. We are a corrupt creation. Our fallibleness makes us vulnerable to heartaches and heartbreaks.
And then we try to move on...
Our souls contain darknesses that may never come into the light of day. However, to dissect our limitations, our mental capabilities, our breaking points; can help piece together a compatible human being to another unforeseen passerby that may be seeking the same dissection into their psyche as you. Then, your ability to grow together, as two separate human beings, can allow for a genuine love and respect for one another.
Again, that is not to say that in other given circumstances, there is not someone else who would be just as suitable, but I do believe that it is limited to a few possibilities for true, unadulterated love. Take my parents for example...over 30 years of love and respect for one another. I am positive their spiritual intensity for one another has not only included an attachment through eternity, but a completely sealable love for one another that will surpass the stars and moon. Lovely isn't it?
However, not everyone is as fortunate. My belief may lead to the bellowing laughter of God seated upon his throne, looking down upon me because of all my past transgressions for sardonic pleasures of viewing my physical hindrances. Aye, I agree that I can push my views too far; far beyond the "common" religious viewing pleasure. However, I do not think that God can be placed in an "almighty" seat unless he contains all that is. I am positive he has a cynically sarcastic side in which he utilizes the viewing of the most humanly embarrassing; all the while, maintaining the purest of compassion. Although, in my truest of heart, I cannot believe God allows suffrage to maintain its degrading status through society without a somewhat hands off method.
Therefore, soulmates? No. One cannot truly rely on the suffrage of being anything less of a "whole" if one is created in the image of God. We are a race of judgment and greed, but we are a race that yearns for acceptance and love, whether or not it comes from a significant other, or it comes from an individual that allows one to become enlightened in their own personal beliefs. Soulmates become a negatively drone point to those who wait, and wait, and wait, and wait, and wait, and wait...and, shall I continue?
What do I say?
Stop waiting. Live your life as though you and everything you hold dear will be sucked into an abysmal black hole within seconds. Material items can only be brought as far as death, not beyond. However, the love and respect your soul has gained throughout this merciless life, will completely reform your being throughout the endless journey of eternal enlightenment. Fret no more about finding "the one", and focus more on finding "the one who allows you to extend and exceed your spiritual capabilities".
Allow the sun set on your desire for what could be, and to reveal what is, deep within your soul, deep within your mind, and deep within your anomaly to live as a whole human being for whatever time you may be allotted before departing for the enlightening, unforeseen beyond. That does not mean sleep with every being at your disposal, but to be aware of the souls around you and their capabilities to positively impact your soul. I do not yearn to be a hearsay, but to be a mainstay of my fate, of my ability to join forces with our harrowing souls, educated to be a beacon of light through life's darkest of storms.
And that, may friends, is why I do not believe in soulmates. You are an individual with the power to change the world. Why not do it as a whole being, and not just partially fulfilled until the "perfect" human being walks up to your front door?
God may laugh heartily now.
The soul my be enlightened, and the darkness may fret at your door; but through it all you're blessed with an anchorage of light sealed to your core.